Overcoming Fear and Reclaiming the Beauty and Joy in Birth

Pregnancy and birth have so many emotions attached to them. Excitement. Doubt. Anticipation. Love. Contentment. Discomfort. Happiness. Worry. Joy. Fear.

Fear.

There is a lot to be afraid of for any mom. And even more so for a first time mom, having never experienced all things motherhood before.

It's normal to fear childbirth. Especially in our country, where women stop eachother in grocery stores to share their birth horror stories with eachother. Our country, where childbirth costs more than any other country in the world, but doesn't have the improved outcomes to show for all that extra expense. Our country, where many doctors and midwives practice based in fear.

This fear is doing none of us any good. It's turned a normal, natural, God-designed process that can and should be beautiful and joyful into a cold, sterile, medical procedure wrapped in fear.

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Where has this fear come from? Fear. Fear begets fear. It begins with one bad outcome, one horror story, one heartbreak that turns into a fear. And then fear takes hold and grows and eventually, childbirth is the most terrifying experience one can imagine. 

Fear also causes tension. And tension causes pain. Then that pain causes more fear. And it goes around and around. The fear-tension-pain cycle is a pretty well known phrase within the birth world. And it sucks all the wonderful things out of childbirth. 

Sometimes, bad things happen. And it's awful and heartbreaking. But, letting fear of those bad things take over, steals the incredible potential there is for joy, beauty and love in childbirth. Fear is a dirty theif. 

Don't let fear steal that from you, friends. You deserve love and joy and beauty. 

But what about Eve? Didn't she ruin it for us? Isn't childbirth suppposed to be awful?

Birth is supposed to be hard work. I will never tell a mom otherwise. It is powerful and intense and a lot of work. But, that hard work doesn't steal the beauty and joy. Fear steals it. Childbirth can be both a lot of intense hard work and incredibly beautiful and joyful. We just need to kick fear to the curb. 

How do we do that? How do we reclaim the joy, love,and beauty in our childbirths? 

*Have faith in the way our bodies have been created. (Psalm 139:14 ~ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.)
– Also, educate yourself about your body and the design of birth. There is power in knowledge. 

*Give your worries and fears to God through prayer. Ask for His peace to fill your heart. (Philippians 4:6-7 ~ Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.) 

*Claim the power you have through God to cast out fear. (2 Timothy 1:7 ~ For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.)

*Trust God's plan, not only for you, but for your baby as well. (Jeremiah 29:11 ~ For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.)

*Stand on God's promise that you can do ALL THINGS with Him. (Philippians 4:13 ~ I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.)

*Support. Find a provider who does not fear birth. Hire a doula to guide, educate, and support you on your journey.

It is my prayer that moms release their fears to The Lord, embrace their bodies' design, trust God's plan for them and their children, and reclaim their births.